It has been three
weeks since beginning my transformation with DASH. I am down 6 pounds as of
last Friday! That is 2 pounds each week so far! I am thrilled! I am down to
313.4. I still have a long ways to go, and I feel like after each workout and
each time I eat Brussels sprouts and tilapia I
should be down at least 10 pounds. Right? This last week has been my most
difficult. The emotional tie I have to food is overwhelming and embarrassing.
With every emotion there is the craving for food. If the emotion is negative
the desire is that much stronger, and without moderation. It is like trying to
fill a bottomless pit.
I went out to
celebrate with my sister-in-law for her birthday Friday night. We went to a
Mexican restaurant. I knew where we were going and tried to plan ahead. I knew
I would order the fajitas instead of a chimichanga. I would only eat 16 chips
and salsa. Well, I ordered my fajitas, didn’t eat the tortillas, ate my 16
chips, and the rice and beans, and the rice pudding. 1800 calories later I am
feeling regret, embarrassment, shame, etc. I came to a realization Friday night
. . . I used to eat meals like this all of the time. I
used to ignore my consumption, and I used to pretend like nobody else noticed.
Like this was normal behavior. I laugh a little when I think about how much I
try to hide the things that have led me to my current weight, and yet my current
weight speaks for itself.
This week I am
preparing for my twins’ fifth birthday parties, am spending more time at work,
and have already missed two exercise classes. Stress is a reality. Stress is
another trigger to my eating. So far I am hanging in there with my intake, but
I can literally track my emotions by my food diary. I am nervous for Friday’s
weigh in, but no matter what I will push forward! NEVER GIVE UP!
(Positive self-talk.)
If I can do it . . . you can do it!!!
